The Power of Asking: Behavioural Influence in Action

 

(WATCH THE VIDEO ABOVE TO EXPLORE HOW STRATEGIC QUESTIONING TRANSFORMS INFLUENCE, NEGOTATION AND TRUST)

Summary of the Video:

This video aims to explore how asking questions is in fact a powerful tool that can be exerted for influence, negotiation and behavioural change. Through exploring psychological research by Flynn and Lake (2008), Huang et al. (2017), Hills' ABC Model, and many other psychological concepts, the video emphasises the idea that asking builds trust, captures attention and is a driving force for cooperation. In the final segment, these ideas are brought to life by exploring the power of asking questions as a new team member at a new role. The overall message is clear, asking questions, typically regarded as a soft skill, isn't that, instead, it is a scientifically grounded strategy.

Extended Analysis on the Power of Asking Questions

This section will explore the experimental evidence that supports and extends on the psychological theories that the video brought forwards.

One of the key findings in this area of psychology is that asking follow-up questions specifically, plays a pivotal role in increasing interpersonal likeability. Huang et al. (2017), in a series of experiments, examined question-asking across various real-life scenarios. The study we are focusing on consisted of participants taking part in speed-dating conversations. It was found that those who asked a greater amount of follow-up questions, were typically significantly more likely to be selected for a second date. The paper argues that follow up questions signal active listening and genuine interest, as such, they allow for a stronger connection in social and professional contexts (Huang et al., 2017).

Furthermore, as mentioned in the video, in everyday life, due to fear of rejection people hold back from asking for help. However, in Flynn and Lake (2008), this was disproved. A series of experiments exposed that people consistently underestimate how likely others are to say 'yes' when asked for help. Flynn and Lake (2008) obtained the results, "the first 3 studies, people underestimated by as much as 50% the likelihood that others would agree to a direct request for help."

This could be as a result of egocentric bias, this is what the researchers believe. We focus on our own awkwardness and based off this we neglect social norms that drive others to comply, majority of people are socially conditioned to help. Many people say yes out of politeness, not due to being deeply motivated. The power of asking lies not just in the question itself, but in overcoming the misplaced fear of refusal.

One of the most compelling explanations for the effectiveness of asking questions comes from B.F. Skinner's (2005) work, the ABC model of influence: Attention, Behaviour and Consequence, as mentioned in the video. While Skinner defined A as 'Antecedent', it has the same general idea. You must capture the attention of the person you are asking the question, prompt a behavioural response and then reinforce that action through a positive consequence, such as trust or respect or cooperation. Indeed, as Skinner  notes, "what a man does is the result of specifiable conditions" (2005, p.6). Here, the idea that strategic questioning isn't just a soft skill is highlighted, rather, it's a behavioural idea that influences interactions.

Edmonson (1999) further supports the power that asking questions possesses. In this paper, an empirical study was conducted involving 51 manufacturing teams, Edmondson found that teams with higher levels of psychological safety, a shared belief that it is safe to take interpersonal risks, were significantly more likely to engage in learning behaviours, such as asking for help or seeking feedback. The study showed that psychological safety predicted these behaviours even when controlling for team efficacy, and that learning behaviour fully mediated the relationship between psychological safety and team performance. Thus, this is further proof that asking questions isn't only for exchanging information, it fosters an environment in which one can learn, it is a catalyst for performance. 

To conclude, the video's overall argument, that asking questions is a powerful tool for influence, is an argument that is firmly supported by psychological research. It increases likeability, helps in overcoming egocentric biases, and shapes behaviour through reinforcement and encourages learning cooperatively. It is not a passive gesture, but a strategic mechanism for building trust and achieving more effective interactions.

Reflection 

Asking questions strategically is a skill that spans across leadership, teamwork, education and policy. The power it possesses doesn't lie in the extraction of answers, but in the space that the questions create. This space is inhabited by cooperation, trust and shared problem-solving. 

Something to think about: How could you use questioning to build influence in your own environment? What ethical lines should we consider when using psychology to persuade?

References

Edmondson, A. (1999). Psychological safety and learning behavior in work teams. AdministrativeScience Quarterly, 44(2), 350–383. https://doi.org/10.2307/2666999

Flynn, F. J., & Lake, V. K. B. (2008). If you need help, just ask: Underestimating compliance with direct requests for help. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 95(1), 128–143. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.95.1.128

Hills, T.T. (expected 2023). The ABCs of behavioral influence. In G. Progrebna and T. T. Hills (Eds) The Handbook of Behavioral and Data Science. Cambridge University Press.

Hills, T. (2025). If You Want More Out of Life, Just Ask. Psychology Today.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/statistical-life/201402/if-you-want-more-out-

life-just-ask

Huang, et al. (2017). It doesn't hurt to ask: Question-asking increases liking. Psycnet.apa.org. https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2Fpspi0000097

Skinner, B. (2005). SCIENCE AND HUMAN BEHAVIOR. https://www.behaviorpedia.com/wp- content/uploads/2013/01/Science_and_Human_Behavior.pdf?utm_source=chatgpt.com

Hills,